The Hallucination Continuous…

by Monty Milne

What’s going on inside me?
I’m gone, I’m gone;
I sway to and fro;
I sway to fro.
Something got a hold inside me!!
Burn white fire, burn;
Inside us all.
Who am I …?

A phone call distance race run-around.
I’m so scared AIDS will catch my faltering body;
Run down after years of chemicals
That didn’t clean my machine.
I’m no good with comfort anymore.

My tiger just roared!
I want to levitate;
Please let me levitate.
I bond my soul to you;
let me hover!

Lost in another …
My memory is so fucked up;
I’m lost and gone!

I severely hallucinated tonight;
I was at a party.
(I swear I’m capturing de javu)
The mystery woman was at this party;
(Second time I saw her today; I did not drink).

This strange part of me just rampaged into my mind
and demanded to be heard.
The Light changes with the Dark;
each respects the division incision.

My dick is sick;
It has no heart to run to.
There is something I feel
I must always do;
I’m recalling past memories
like I have had exactly before.

I swear on my bare, naked soul
I told the truth tonight in my revealings.
Will you ring tonight for me?
Visions can become real;
I care for the Wizards;
I tame the Lizards.
Kiss me, kiss me,
One and all
before I become
a nothing
into something bigger and beyond.

I swear I heard this message
Of a girl who wants to meet me;
someone else also and it involved cigarettes.
The connection between her and
The Mystery Woman.
(Who also won me over)
Is it safe … ?????

This is exciting and new;
please, please
expel me from Hell!
This Hell of Hell’s!
I hate Hell!!!!!

He said something about his house being haunted;
(I specifically remember it!)
We were in one at some point
in a spooky spider web …
I completely lost myself for a moment …
I’M LIVING ID!!!!!!!!!
The visions keep rolling in like
an avalanche with hungry boulders.
This is my own ceremony;
The one I foretold of moons before.

What did I see?
I never saw so much.
This was all done in one night,
in front of the white, lit candles;
capturing visions through thoughts and pens.

I keep forgetting where I am;
this whole time I’m completely gone.
This would be a good note of death;
the shape that hunts us all.
(Please Angel, save me, come through my
roof, enter my loins;
my heart wilters fast)

We are reversed;
someone called;
Thank You Angel,
you sound sincere.
I like telephone aura;
my new life begins today (again!).

I’m just getting so close to that
Sexual Crossover connection;
sweet girls that want me; finally!
Will you dance?
I promise I’ll try.

Things will change;
things will change.
Chant this prayer.
Things will change;
I promise you my love,
my Angel;
I will bless thee; solemnly.

The older the isolation the younger
(Quicker) it takes to get there.
What the hell am I doing looking for love!?
I’m becoming my worst fear;
I’m a loser.

Maybe my “Special, new friend from another place”
will float in and unsettle me;
please and praise let it be;
I’m so hungry.
Bone pecked and skinned from the vultures of soul;
not a morsel left for my sleepy heart.
(A little while passes)

I am so gone now;
from another world.
Where was I?
I didn’t go there or see them did I?

The perfect sex society.
A stranger rang twice tonight
(I was upstairs in a white staircase).
Phone numbers are like life lines;
I feel Death sniffing for me
because I can’t pay the installment fee.
(More weird music floats in;
the sound is in opaque, purple/floral patterns;
smell the fragrance of something so alive.)

These Trance Scriptures are freeing me;
I am exiting a great period of doubt and
re-entering a fresh rebirth of prosperity.

My transformation to Seer has been finalized;
beauty is mine for once;
thank you brave Something.

No more cauldrons and leftover spells;
I can’t believe the smoke has cleared forever.
(A deep, fresh breath is taken by all
and in unison)
Something freaky happened …

Did I get a bad call? …
A violent man? …
Things fucked - up? …
Yeah …
(But not me!)
… yet anyway …?

A Life is always worth a Life;
remember that.
Please be kind to this reluctant outcast;
I’m the last of the loner breed.
(Prisoner! Prisoner!)
I’m a ghost in my own house;
I’m so scared;
I don’t want to cry or hide anymore.
TV Rock ‘n’ Roll is vibrating in my skull.
(The soft brain; I bless you greatly)

Whatever shall I do?
I am creating an opera
from stars I find on phone lines;
my own mad kingdom.
Let’s Rock ‘n’ Roll!;
Scream like primal Half-Animals;
We emerging (not there yet) humans.

This is a strange tablet;
I feel restless and my pen is dry.
The ink looks like a crayon;
I feel like a kid again!
Dragons must be real;
I feel their bite in my young man’s ass.

The alien implant is really
disrupting my view of a so-called
normal reality.

My music strings drown out my sorrow
over the radio;
it sounds good and clear.
I thoroughly enjoy a project that comes together.
I hope I rock with my airwave friends.
So the struggle and mistakes continue;
I’m still a proud person.
I love touching people with my Art;
a Universal experience.
Social functions are mislabeled;
I wish I weren’t an alien cell with
fake human DNA;
I want to rejoin the tribe.

My focus is becoming focused;
I’m not scared anymore!
My Mind Fairy showers me with
spice-scented gifts of extraordinary creativeness.
Things turn dark when you least expect it.
Don’t jump from the shadows;
spit in their cowardly faces.

There’s no Tigers anymore;
what a great refrain;
come on sweet love.
The gratification grows over the years;

I’m in bloom and ripe;
pick me;
pick me;
pick me!
I’m a favorite taste;
your suitable score.

Everyone fucking hates me and I know it;
whatever shall I do?
Sorry I was born with the mind
of an acid trip
while all of you counted you’re A, B, C’s.
I couldn’t help myself,
my body has always been in rage.

Return me to the Island of Angels
where they wash my feet
and feed me milk and honey with love.
My loins miss the fire;
I extinguished it twice;
my own foolishery.

I still wish something mind-blowing
would happen at this moment …

A Black pearl from the sunset;
sharing Newports with White trash.
We’re from two different worlds.
Let’s take my bike and spend the night
at my laboratory so I can study you;
like I studied my every movement.

I’m so sensitive at this moment;
I’m lonely.
I’m a fizzling, permented
yet unopened bottle of Joy.

I’m in full power over any Afterworld
because I’m not scared of them;
bring Them on!

I wish a beautiful Dream Female
would accept me and ride my sexual dream.
My whole body is lonely beyond
the awful pain of guilt.
Forgive me, you are gone forever;
I’m sorry I wasted my chance.

A phone call to you;
you will never know what happened.
Oh praise my beautiful words;
their soft flutter;
the taste of butter.
I urge some of you women
to come reach me tonight;
inside each other we will be alright.
Take care of me;
I’m a frail package;
I can’t move like I used to.

A Book in a night;
written in Truth;
to Help.
I love peace;
just leave me alone.

I love when life just tumbles and
rolls along at a caring pace;
I feel good right now.
I know how to change my future;
I have seen it;
My Vision has become my Reality.

It’s early in my fishtank head;
my emotions are singing to me
at this woozy moment;
I appreciate myself at last.
The Transformation has finally happened;
Fear cast off for good like the last
straw before it hit the camel’s back.
I want to live full again;
be well and happy;
I certainly prefer pleasure to pain.

Bless you great Art, I will do your bidding!
Grant me just one Angel to nurture and feed
with love in a Garden of Delights we grew ourselves.

Maybe one of the Mysterious Strangers will call
and brighten my dimmering life.
Please help me to hang on the rung
and not slip back down
the ladder of Despair.

A letter of Desire is what I will write
to the Lover I will embrace.
Draw your visions to me;
I will forever cherish them.

I love reliving moments of happiness again.
I have such a broad writing area!
… Sweet Freedom!!

Nobody will grind me anymore …
(The Meatgrinder)
I’m simultaneously capturing sound,
sight, and words in a special
Artistic Realm …
I’m floating in it’s emotions;
It’s great meaning.
Special love like none ever felt before,
presented to the World as a
gift of unequaled Friendship.
I must always be open …
No more Blues to whistle …

Does that stranger who glazed my way
think I might be for her?
Memories last a lifetime …
Like the last time I saw …
… and of course we move on;
onward to unknown Fate.

What a Poetic Expansion I’m mellowing into;
this Grand Trance always comes back
to help me.

Look Out!
Suddenly places don’t seem the same.
(That was so true just then and it was scary;
the Establishment was near)

What is outside of my pain?
I just felt my pain and a burst
of my music soothed me.

(Grand Trance)
Heal yourself, for yourself!

I am proud of my works;
bless the sweet singer;
sugar notes;
I wish I could kiss her invisible breeze.
Nothing will happen to you or I;
I will provide refreshment
and relish our union.

May this girl tomorrow help me;
please be brave.
Arthur, my senses are gone;
you’d be proud.
The same Ghost Women haunt me too.

I will breathe with flesh again;
Not tonight I’m afraid … AAHHH!
I feel so alone.
What is this Life thing anyway?
Thin, desperate threads of connection
that attract people;
the strange attempt to bond and center
around the Common Thing.

They gave Heaven to themselves
but lost it along the way.
Let’s bring Heaven back;
for every person and portion of this Universe.

The Mystery Stranger has yet to appear;
strive to be a Supreme Human;
One above and beyond the natural
call of duty.

It will blow luck right into your racing heart.
I’m casting a spell at the moment;
I want action from the Talking Wires;
come speak with me.
(My Vision has been sent with Love and Hope)

You want a Holy Book, a Holy Person …?
I wander facelessly, because I am just like you;
and you like me.
Look, probe, dig, burrow, and claw
past your Fear and demons to discover
the Messiah in yourself;
the Light is real, and the Light is ours;
shared between those who love;
through indifference, tragedy, and forces of chance
still beyond our control.
We will always survive;
I will live long and alive!!!

Whose ever going to love my lonely heart?;
gotta love myself first;
here I am, hug me;
I want to keep riding the Grand Trance;
the one I captured on these pages.
I want to help;
to give;
to cherish;
to embrace;
to forgive;
to forget;
to remember;
and to regret.
I want my life to smell
like wild red and white roses;
colors mixing together in love and unity.
I hear the Grand Trance in my head;
we will all meet with it together someday.
Share the Day and Night;
live with the Dark and Light.
Balance with the Trance;
to live with harmony and happiness
wherever you may roam.

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Visual Art by Monty Milne